Surviving Cohabitation in Your Relationship

Moving in with the person you love is truly a part of life… At least, it was a part of my life. Growing up, my mother always told me three things. 1- Finish college. 2-Be your own person. And last, but certainly not least 3- Live with a man before you marry him. All of which have seriously stuck with me for the last 22 years. It’s still a controversial topic for many of those that I know, but I firmly believe moving in with your significant other is an imperative part of a relationship, and ensuring you want to be with them.
That being said, cohabitation is no joke y’all. Thomas and I had been dating for two years before we moved in together. Within the first two years of our relationship we learned so much about each other, but managed to maintain our individuality. We decided to move in together because we both knew it made sense, and we were ready for that step. We’ve lived together for over two years now (that makes four years together y’all!), and It has been some of the greatest times of my life. 
Like I said, cohabitation is hard, but it is the most rewarding, fun experience!
 
1. Comfort levels change. Did you not realize plucking your eyebrows in front of your vanity included a sexy man watching you? Yeah. Now it does. And it’s so normal. So no, you don’t need to wake up an hour before them just to pluck your eyebrows or put on your makeup.
 
2. News flash. Your legs are not always going to be Venus smooth. And that is a fact of life.
 

 

3. Things aren’t always going to be an even balance. Some days, you aren’t going to want to touch the three loads of laundry or the dishes in the sink and some days your S/O won’t want to, and that is OKAY! Because chances are, you both won’t always feel that way at the same time. Some days you’ll take on more chores, and some days your partner will. And I promise, eventually, your house will be clean. 
 
4. Routine is not always your friend. Do you remember how you dreaded high school? That’s because it was the same thing, every single week. Change your weekly routine’s up. Don’t always have the same meals each week, don’t do your laundry on the same days, and do not plan to have sex on the same day every week. Yep, I went there. 
 
5. Enjoy your time. Working opposite schedules, or always trying to do separate things when you’re home together can cause major issues. Relish in the time you are just together. Moving in together, doesn’t just mean you are living in the same place together, it means enjoying things together, working together, and most importantly, loving each other in more ways than you knew how to do before.
 
Living with your significant other isn’t always rainbows and butterflies, but it’s a hell of a lot more fun if you just chill out a little and realize that things are not always going to be perfect. I’m in no way an advocate for moving in with someone before you are married, but I certainly think it has made my relationship stronger, and given both Thomas and I a better perspective on what married life might be life, as well as just life in general. 

 

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23 comments

  1. I LOVED and appreciated this post SO much because of how candid you were! I lived with an SO for a couple of months while my apartment was being built and it was honestly something I recommend to every couple. It was hard to get comfy at first (with stuff like taking my sweet time to blow dry my hair since we shared a bathroom or going #2…not gonna lie that was SO awkward) but you learn so much about a person when you share a space.

    http://thealwaysblog.com

  2. Love love love this, Tiffani! Cam and I haven't lived together yet, but we practically did last year when we were 4 townhomes apart haha. I love the part about routines not being your friend – it's definitely going to be beneficial in your relationship to not plan so much and to just mix things up whether that's what day of the week you get dinner together or what kind of trips you go on! Great post, girl!

    X,
    Cristina / cristinawashere.com

  3. I live with my fiancé and have since 2014 and it has been great. I definitely think its important to live with each other before getting married as well because living together you are able to see what the person is really like.

    xoxo, Jenny

  4. Hahahaha yassss! I love your point about legs not always being smooth. My husband just knows now that I don't shave as much in the winter time (and even sometimes in summer) Hahahah!

  5. Ha! My boyfriend and I moved in together in March and there is a SERIOUS adjustment period. Like, I like the air down at night and to sleep in the COLD, he doesn't. So many things you have to balance out!

  6. YESSS! Oh my goodness, I'm thankful my BF & I both like it cold at night, but there are little ways he does things that are so opposite of how I do it, it drives me NUTS! But it really is all about balance!

  7. I think the "their stuff" part was one of the biggest adjustments for me! It's crazy all of the little things you don't anticipate when moving in together.

  8. YESSS! Like no honey, I'm not shaving my legs two days in a row in the dead of winter just because it feels better to you. It's all of the little things that you both slowly adapt to, haha!

  9. I've loved living with my boyfriend and these tips are ALL so true! lol at the eyebrow plucking thing because…yes.

    -Meagan | Love by Meagan

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